Worth It All
“I can’t find the exit from my suffering.”
“This is my last option, I don’t know what to do.”
“I just want him to stop drinking.”
“I haven’t seen my husband in fifteen day. He left like it is easy. All I want is for him to help me with the kids.”
“If something happens to me…Who will take care of my son?”
“I feel so alone.”
“I didn’t have money to eat today.”
“I want my kids to study…but, where am I going to get the money. I told them it’s better if they don’t.”
“Please, don’t tell anyone.”
“He started crying and screaming in pain at midnight, but there is no medicine that will help him.”
“It has been almost a year since my husband died. It still hurts like it was yesterday.”
“Even if someone has all the little things they need, even if we can’t see it, there will always be something missing in them.”
“I don’t believe in anything anymore. Everything I have ever belived in has failed me.”
“I wanted a different life for her.”
“Sometimes the depression just grabs me. It drags me to a dark place.”
“I just ask God to take me away. But, He just won’t do it. I feel like I talk and he doesn’t listen.”
These are all things we have heard over the past three days. Honestly, it hurts. These things have all come from people we love and care about. People who have openly welcomed us in as family without question.
There is nothing we would rather do than alleviate all their suffering. But, more often that not we are left asking ourselves ‘what do we even do?’ The problems seem too big and the answers too few.
At times it can feel like there will never be a moment of peace. It feels like we are making no progress. You feel defeated.
But, then you hear other things.
“Thank you for being there for me in the darkness.”
“You have taken away a huge burden.”
“I used to worry all the time, but now I know I don’t have to because you are here.”
“Thank you for fixing my family.”
“I’m so thankful you are here.”
People here think we are crazy. We wash our clothes in the public washing area with everyone else. We haul water and wood. We do the same things as everyone else in the community. They look at us and see us as different, but with our actions we are showing them we are all the same. They see us on our bad days and realize we are human too and we are all the same when it comes down to it. We strive to create an environment where people feel safe. Although all of the things people tell us weigh heavily on our hearts, we are so happy to listen. What an honor it is to have earned their trust. While you can’t fix peoples problems, you can choose to be there and share the burden. Here at Cosechando Felicidad, we share our burdens. Sure we are frequently overwhelmed, but we are overwhelmed together. In the end it is all worth it. The good outweighs the bad. It doesn’t matter if there are sleepless nights, tears shed, or if we are stressed out. While often the answers to the problems we face cannot be foud on the earth, we hold tight to the hope of heaven where all will be made right.